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# The privacy and publicness problem.
- URL: https://onemanandhisblog.com/2013/04/facebook-dangers-choice-family/
- Published: 2013-04-15T11:47:19.000Z
- Updated: 2015-04-08T15:54:26.000Z
- Author: Adam Tinworth
- Tags: privacy, publicness, relationships, Social Media, social networks

[![H-pop](https://i1.wp.com/www.onemanandhisblog.com/content/images/2013/04/h-pop-thumb-640x263-3023.jpg?resize=640%2C263)](https://i1.wp.com/www.onemanandhisblog.com/content/images/2013/04/h-pop.jpg?ref=onemanandhisblog.com)

Interesting look at the problems of keeping [your personal life hidden away from your online presence](http://www.purplecar.net/2013/04/losingconnections/?ref=onemanandhisblog.com):

> Last week, I lunched with different former coworkers (yes, I keep friends from every job I’ve ever had!) who told me there was no evidence online that I was still married. They actually wondered if I was getting divorced because of the lack of references to my husband. They found a mention or two on Twitter or elsewhere that I have children, but nothing about my husband.

The discussion in the comments is well worth a look.

I have my own variation on that issue: my wife likes to keep a low-to-invisible social media profile, which means that my own image online is a curiously lop-sided version of whom I am in reality. And the arrival of Hazel has complicated things further, because I want to post about her, like any doting Dad, but I also have to be mindful of my wife’s feelings.

My family and friends are divided into two pretty clear camps – those who use social media and those who don’t. Some of the people closest to me are the ones in the latter camp. If nothing else, this illustrates that a social media-focused publishing approach will only reach a subset of the population…