I have lived in the same flat for the last eight years of my life, and I have always been pleased by the fact that Lewisham Council stops its streetlight Christmas decorations just across the road from my block. Alas, no longer. Now the lights are lit I can no longer hide from the fact that there are jolly Christmas lights outside my flat. They glare festively through the hall window from nightfall (around 4pm these days) through to the following morning. There’s nothing for it. Lorna and I are going to have to get fairly lights, trees, tinsel, the whole nine yards.

Let’s get festive.